Invisibility

Elisabeth and I have been together now for about two years and very close friends nearly ten. Still, to this day, she has the uncanny ability to make me feel invisible. There isn't much that she does that wears on my nerves, and apart from smacking my lips the last two chews of every bite, there's not much I do either. (she even handles my constant tapping) It's a silly thing she does, but it hurts me deeply. I feel like I'm not present when this takes place, and it happens often. Even though we've talked about it and I've expressed my thoughts, nothing has changed. Since being here, less than two weeks, it has happened twice. Like I said, it's silly, but she never introduces me to new people. Whether it is a friend, co-worker, family member or just an acquaintance, I never get introduced. Sometimes I just throw my hand out and intro myself, "Hi, I'm Christopher...her boyfriend." Which makes me feel like a hu-mungo chode because I had to give my title, it's like she's embarrassed by me or something. I know that she is not, and I know that she just forgets each time, but it sucks. I feel unimportant when it happens, and I get the opinion that other people look at me the same way when she forgets to intro me. Maybe I'm just paranoid, but it drives me crazy. It happened again tonight and it set me off.

On another sad note, I really miss my students. I've been thinking about them since down here and I want to see them and hang out. It's funny how DL works. Most teachers and students don't develop such a relationship, but it always happens in DL. I miss there company and I miss the weekly marching percussion fix they allowed. I hope I get the chance to see them over break.

This is a dreary post, sorry, but thanks for letting me vent.